What the hell is this whole “mushroom printing” malarkey?
There are a hell of a lot of things in the world that are annoying. Like people who drive UNDER the speed limit in the fast lane. Because we’re not all insane, we can’t exactly go around vigilante-style and inform the assholes of the world that they are, in fact, assholes. So what’s The Internet to do? Mushroom Printing is a group blog where we can give a hearty smackdown to the shit that bugs us.
What’s a mushroom print?
It’s simple, Printers: a mushroom print is a very crude term for smacking someone in the face, in our case deservedly, with a certain member of the human body, usually found on a male. In short, a Mushroom Print is a dick-slap.
I have something to snark about! How do I give a mushroom print?
First, you probably want to read the rules (below). Rules suck, I know, but I kind of needed to cover my ass on this because obviously. Then, sign up for an account. Choose a username and a password will be mailed to you. Once you have that, you can log in, reset your password to something you might actually have a chance of remembering, and snark away!
I don’t want to be spanked for misbehaving. What are the rules for posting?
1.) No identifying information like name or Social Security number. If you have a photo, edit out faces or we will do it for you.
2.) This is not a hate site. You are writing to be complainy, but also (mostly) for entertainment, so please tell a story, not just a “I hate my mother-in-law!!!” one-liner. Also, we’re not here to attack each other. A healthy discussion is fine, but if you get vicious, we won’t post your comments. Speaking of which:
3.) EVERYTHING, including comments, will be going into moderation. Really, it’s for the greater good. Like deodorant. And bacon! Similarly, everything is subject to editing to make it more entertaininger or to take out stuff deemed take-outable.
4.) Not everything may be published, because OBVIOUSLY. We will make every effort to publish what you write, but if the post comes across as too mean, racist, too rude, defamatory (I don’t know what that means, but it sounds fancy!), driver may not always carry cash, call your doctor for erections lasting longer than 4 hours, no I don’t want to look at the rash on your crotch.
5.) This isn’t a paid site. Which I figure you probably know, but I think it’s worth it to establish that definitively.
How do I get a jazzy-ass avatar instead of a lame generic-y one?
You can go here and make one. It’s free and it’s pretty easy, if my very addled brain can remember correctly.
Can I change my display name that other people see?
Why yes, yes you can. While you do need a real WordPress username and valid email address that will not change, you can post under any name.
I want my post to be anonymous, not under my username. How can I do that?
Well, you could make your username “anonymous.” Har har har. But really, you can just stick a little note at the top of your post, and Your Editing Slores will publish it under “admin.”
Ahhhh I don’t understand how to work Teh WordPress!!! What do I do?
You can read my painfully explicit WordPress for Dummies post. Anything I do not cover, you can probably either figure out on your own or Google. If you’re REALLY desperate, you can email me on my own blog, but don’t expect actual answers from me, because I am the reason that tech support “loses” my number.
May I put a link/info about my own site/blog in with my post?
Definitely. You can add a link at the bottom with the name of your blog, or your button (this is a button):
I submitted a post but it didn’t show up! Where is it?!?!?!!
Remember the part in the rules (above) where we told you that everything is moderated? After you submit that bad boy, it gets reviewed. It’ll be published after one of the spiffy editing slores takes a peek.
I want a nifty Mushroom Printing badge for my site! I can has?
Indeedy! Feel free to grab your own Mushroom Printing badge and display it with motherfucking pride.
How about passive aggressive letters to our neighbors? Anyone interested in those?
Hells yes, we can.
Is this site just to write about the things that piss you off the most or is it a place where you can share a funny story as well? I LOVE your blog and it inspires me to start my own but I haven’t yet. I’m just not sure I have enough to say. But every once in awhile something funny will come up and I’ll be like “That would be good to blog about”. Just wondering.
I think that you can do either. Since I don’t want this to turn into a “I HAAATTEEE (whine whine whine)” site, funny, entertaining, snarky stories are always welcome.
OH SHINY.
What if I already HAVE a word press account? I got one with my blog name just to be sure no one else could have it. Crazy much? Yes, yes I am.
I fucking love this site!!!!! Talking smack is my favorite!
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